//hearing aid: sometimes when we touch - dan hill

i'm just a another drifter, still trapped within my youth

my dad's favourite song sounds convienently gay. it came on in the car and he started "sometimes when we touch..." and i blurted out that it was suspicious like dan hill was singing to a guy. he glared at me in the rear view mirror.

"who taught you that?"
"taught me what?"
"homosexuality."
"um. school?"
"what? i pay 5k so you learn about gay people? what is the education coming to?!"

my mother, the life buoy, floats swiftly into the situation.

"haiya, its good she knows. Can you believe if she goes into a gay bar? she'll cry if she didn't know gay men exist."

thanks mom.

the car ride was filled with lesbian talk, gay sex (euwww) and the gay people in the workforce.
oh well, its one of those times when the family dares to speak about sex. and where me and my brother squirm.

speaking of cars, desmond's happily taking his license now. which is a big relief for me.
no more unable to eat at where i want to cos he needs to save moolah.
no more fussing over textbooks to buy.
more far-away places to go and explore once he can drive
no more excuses to not go anywhere.

i can't wait.

i really want to get my license, but i sort of see no need to do so now.
but seeing all my friends get their drive is getting to me.

sunflowers. where are they?

//hearing aid: i predict a riot - kaizer chiefs

i detest people who don't say thank you

i use to just take it that i'm the better person when it came to the ps and qs and not demand that people say them when they should. now i just think singaporeans are getting downright ungrateful and rude.

Case 1:
just the other day, i held a door for a lady who was a good distance away from me. i saw her coming and so i held the door for her.

happily, without a grin, she waltzes right past me and not with a single acknowledgement or anything.
NO NOD, NO SMILE, NO THANK YOU.

i just smiled and called out: "your welcome!".

she turned for a bit, startled as though i called out her name.
even then she just walked away puzzled.

Case 2:
getting fed up of people just being complacent, i went around doing a few more your welcomes and getting weird stares. oh come one, you never heard of your welcome?!

then finally i decided to push the envelope.

as usual, i held the door for a woman and she saunters right pass me.

"excuse me, you forgot something!"

"oh what?" she searches frantically in her bag

"your thank you." and i walked off

you need to learn how to apprieciate the people around you.
and bloody kindergarten kids are more polite then you.

ok. i shall not rant. i've got more impt things at hand.

shall we saatchi?

//hearing aid: hard to beat - hard-fi

Like a fist, can't resist you


karis afraid.

my brother's work.

//hearing aid: you'll be safe here - rivermaya

Nobody knows, just why we're here
Could it be fate, or random circumstance

i heard catholics are really bad people, is it true?

i heard this comment from a friend. it hurt a little that she thought or heard that people like me are bad. so i asked her if she thought i was bad and she said no.

i rest my case.

pearl's entry on religion spurred me to think. we catholics are being constantly under the eyes of the other demominations.
people ask me random questions and when we can't answer them, we aren't "true to the faith".

then my dear, can u answer all of religion's burning questions?

we believe in everything. saints, mother mary, jesus, angels. we believe that jesus came and went and will come again.
we believe in the holy trinity, the promises that God gave us.
so that's our difference.
we believe that whatever is here, is God.

it hurts me when people come up to me and say i shouldn't be catholic just because "we aren't as praise-worthy"
i hate people coming up to me and saying you still can be saved

i am catholic not satanic.

i don't need to stand up and raise my hands, look as if i am in a trance just so to praise Him.
i worship him softly and in my own time when i deem proper.
i pray to him when i'm alone. i sing to him in my heart.
i love God and will never forsake him.
even if i don't try to convert people.

many people say we should be more pro-active and get people to join the church.
i don't believe in that.
i say, lets concentrate on our souls, purifying it and making it whole.
rather than dragging people from the street to church.

i have so many christian friends who agree with me that there isn't much of a difference between them and me.
we have the same God. how different can it get?

crikes, i think i might get sued for this. haha oh well.
-

i spent the day at home and at holy cross for mass.
fr. jj is amazing at sermons.
it was about being selfish and not sharing your talents in ministry.
i had a sick satisfaction that i wasn't one of those
i should shoot myself.

the night was spent at mr prata with the youngest cousin.
he's grown so much since he came into my life.
gone are the days when i use to tease him about video games and toys.
we talked about politics, relationships and death.


the cousin shaun

then off to russ and ken. desmond, merlynn and nick joined.
home bound now. its good to be home.

put your heart, in my hands. you'll be safe here.

//hearing aid: you'll be safe here - rivermaya

close your eyes, wipe your tears, hold on. you'll be safe here

my sympathies and condolences to nick's family on the demise of your grandpa.
i'll pray for his soul. may his rest in peace.

i should have known
that 35 bucks for a dye job was too good to be true.
my hair has FOUR different highlights.
red, blonde, pink and brown/orange. not counting the black base.
i'm like every women in america. the blonde, the redhead and the brunette.

i'm happy for now
school's been kind to me. the projects sound promisingly bearable.
its been too long i've kinda lost my touch.
i kinda hate being in the situation i'm in. when i have to choose between my morals and my grades.
seem like an easy choice? nope.

he's special.
finally, desmond and me went out.
the plan was to just chow on cheap food and go home cos we have work to do.
but
we ended up having a expensive fantastic jap dinner
a long intelligent conversation over cake and coffee
and a long walk home together.
its nice to see him and still see the special spark in him.

i don't know what i like about him, i just know i do.