jeff buckley, hallelujah
i'm sitting in the coldness of shaun's room, after having a birthday surprise for him. it went well and now he's just reading and i'm having bob, the beagle, as company.
this morning, i had a dream so vivid, it stayed in my mind the entire day. i kept asking people what it could mean, what it said about it, so much so i nearly paid a tarot card reader to interpret it for me. but the finances are suffering thus i am left with what you might think it means:
"it is a wet morning and somehow, everything is monotoned. my mom wakes me up and tells me war is coming and i should grab my important things and run. my room was exactly as i remembered it just before i went to sleep: my book on my headstand and my nail polish on the floor.
i grabbed a jacket, somewhat furry air-force looking one and a pair of jeans and my bag i carried the day before.
outside, there were tanks on my usually serene neighbourhood with soldiers and guns. everything was a hue of grey and green. i stood there with my hands in my pockets and i fished out a gummy bear. i saw kenneth and merlynn standing in line for something so i walked to them.
at this point, i thought to myself is this dream? then why is everything so real? i realised i was enlisted into the army as a decoy, someone to act as bait. my bag was taken away from me and i was issued a white sack to wear. my head was shaved off and i was told i will never see my family again.
i cried at this point of the dream, just sobbing as i sat at the back of a truck. i watched as the truck pulled out past common landmarks around my house and dropped me on a field opposite eminent plaza, a field which isn't there in reality.
i got into a tent where i shared with two people. i keep thinking i'll never see my family again, and how i was going to die. i ate canned food, washed other people's white sacks and realised i was in a 'slave' camp where we were all bald and forced to die.
i was climbing out of my tent when i heard a blast. it was loud but subtle, like in the movies. i ran with all my might and ended up at an old school kopitiam where i heard my name being called.
it was my parents, sitting drinking kopi and eating kaya toast. i hugged them and my mother ordered milo for me. they told me that my brother had died during the war and that now, there was a truce and all decoys who can find their parents within 24 hours will be set free.
i insisted on retrieving my bag from the tent, something which i don't remember having, so my parents said they will wait for me at the kopitiam. i ran off and suddenly a bunch of decoys appeared with me. they followed me to this carpark where i got my bag. i kept wanting to go toward my parents (all by foot) but i kept ending up at this particular carpark.
i was frantic, the thought of never see my family again kept haunting me.
then i woke up.
there was so much detail involved, i kept thinking about it the entire day.
oh well, somethings just dont need to be deciphered.
