Who kicked a hole in the sky, so the heavens would cry over me?
zouk was fucking awesome. besides mr. groper who couldn't keep his hairy, scrawny hands to himself, things were good till i got high on ONE vodka.
no no, i'm a decent drinker, but rus's friend steven isn't a decent bartender. boo.
nonetheless we had fun, going mad with retro and rnb, yelling jumping humping romping. all that ever happens in a club.
i hate where i am now.
its a funny feeling when you're so up there and then a smallest thing happens to jolt you out of your happy place.
i sit here wondering if its just me or is there a fuge picture i'm missing.
you know when u feel that cringe when something happens to someone and not you. oh yes, jealousy
i feel jealous of people who think i'm perfectly secured with myself. i envy those who can't be bothered to care about the world around them.
rus said this to me that night while zouk was playing 'i heard a rumor' by bananarama.
"love is always greater then pride. if you put your pride over love, you're fucking screwed."
and i couldn't agree more.
i've been so happy these few days that i keep thinking something's coming up to screw me over. and all over again i'll be fucked.
i keep on thinking about every word muttered or everything that happens or that doesn't as an omen or a sign and
this brooding is tiring me out day after day especially
when school's being a bitch and when the teachers
think we're robots or fucking circles elephants
that can go on and on and on.
(wow. that's a effing long sentence)
i guess i got the cake. i just want the icing.
